May 22, 2014
Not a City Girl: Part 2
I had another meeting down in the big city today.
I don't get to leave the house often so it's very exciting and refreshing.
But also way out of my element as I've shared before.
I packed and set everything out that I needed last night and turned my alarm back way earlier than usual. A colleague and I had plans to meet an hour before our meeting.
After I got around, I decided if I skipped my daily Keurig date, I would make decent time. After throwing on some shoes and a coat, I hop in the car, crank up Katy Perry's "Roar" and begin zooming off into the sunrise.
Feeling like a gal ready to conquer the world I belt out, "You're gonna hear me rooooarrrrr oar oar oar oar oar!!!!"
I'm bobbing along, the song stops. All is quiet.
Then I hear..... "Meeewwwwwwwwwww"
I'm thinking, "What the heck?" I turn around and our garage/farmshop cat is perched on the center console in the back seat staring at me with those beady, loving eyes.
I didn't think the city would be ready for a barn cat so I whipped 'er back around and took Miss Blazer back home.
Departure, take two.
I'm cruising along, making good time so I decide that I have a dire need for coffee NOW. You know that saying about a Starbucks on every corner? Well, that doesn't apply to the almost two hour drive into the city. You know, when you actually need coffee.There's not even a McDonald's on every corner. There are exactly 3 McDonald's on the way and possibly the same amount of gas stations.
I decide, McDonald's it is.
I pull in and there are two drive thru lanes. I wasn't sure what the proper etiquette was for utilizing these lanes so I just pick one.
Pulling up to the menu, I hear in a loud boisterous voice, "HELLO.WOULDYOULIKETOTRYTHEMCWHITE?"
I politely ask, "The McWHAT?"
"Order when you're ready."
Baffled, I ask for a coffee with cream and sugar.
"How many what?"
"Cream and sugar, m'am."
Assuming they are going by packets I say, "One of each."
"Blah blah blah blah the second window blah blah."
As I begin pull up towards the window, a lady in a white SUV starts pulling up as well and we almost crash into each other. She lays on the horn. I'm all confused because I was done ordering first. Doesn't she realize that if she goes ahead of me, she's going to get my coffee?
I stand my ground and continue pulling forward.
The window opens and a rather large, well, very large woman pops the doors open and my coffee comes shooting out. She's sweating profusely. And I mean PROFUSELY. I watch as a few sweat droplets just barely miss my coffee cup. I force a smile and tell her thank you.
And away I go! Coffee in hand and we're zooming to the big city.
I approach construction and begin the detour and my GPS instantly starts going crazy.
"WHEN POSSIBLE, MAKE AN ILLEGAL U-TURN."
"Shut up!! I know!!"
Does anyone else talk to their GPS systems?
All is going well and I think I'm on the right track then I start approaching round abouts. Much like the double lane at McDonald's, I am still trying to figure out the whole etiquette behind roundabouts.
I pretty much just pull up really slowly, drive in. Break. Drive. Read road sign. Break. Drive. Read road sign. Break. Drive. Cars are honking.
"WHAT?! I am yielding!! It says to yield!!"
Repeat this whole episode times 8 and I'm finally at my destination. I pull into the spot right next to the curb.
I have a great time at the meeting/workshop and venture back out to my car.
As I'm pulling out, my back tire somehow hops onto the curb and I hear, "KAJOINK!"
OOPS. I did it again.
To be continued......